THE VILLAIN ‘S FAITH IS CHALLENGED? A very difficult scene to write because usually you don’t have the villain within the novel questioning their faith, spirituality and loyalty. They are just usually bad, but I would say that’s what makes a good villain because it gives that character a little depth as well and allows the reader to explore what that character’s reasoning for doing what they do throughout the novel.
REVISITING THE VILLAIN
Rewriting chapter 15 for the 2nd draft I revisit Xavier the Villains POV within the first scene. He has one scene in this chapter that reveals who he is and what he stands for as a villain.
GOAL: To find a way better way to capture the yearling pack
CONFLICT: Has an argument with Mary about his faith and loyalty to the Kraldire
OUTCOME: Adrian presets him with a solution
SCENE SYNOPSIS: Xavier reflects on his life after having an argument with Mary about not capturing the yearling pack.
SCENE WORD COUNT : 1631
In the previous chapters and scenes with Xavier he never really truly reveals his past and I guess I have him brooding and complaining about loving the Kraldire(Mary’s mother ) and losing her love. However, this chapter he will finally contemplate his faith . and whether he is making the right decision in being loyal to the Kraldire.
He has had nearly 12,000 years to figure this out . However, at this stage in his immortality he is at his breaking point especially in this scene. In the previous scene he failed at capturing Sirena and he also has failed at not only capturing the Arctos yearling pack but also the earth diver(raven) and collecting the raven claw amulet .
So yeah he is at a breaking point because he knows if he goes back to the Kraldire empty handed this time around she will kill him. Even though they had a thing together he seems to think- no seems to know that the Kraldire will have no need for him anymore.
What makes matters worse is that Mary(council member/companion) caught him using Courian’s(the wolf god) name. And any mention of Courian has been banned by the Kraldire. So he also has to deal with Mary trying to blackmail him into loving her. Because if push came to shove she would rat him out and he would die anyway by the Kraldire’s hand.
So his loyalty and faith is tested while at the same time trying to control his fast paced descent into madness .
Towards the end of the scene he senses one of the yearling running from the human town in the mountain and he tracks them intent on killing the yearling . However , that plan goes array when the yearling , who reveals himself to in fact be Adrian suddenly proposes a solution to Xavier’s problems.
What is this solution? Well I will be continuing to write it in the next scene of the 15th chapter where it will be in Adrian’s POV.
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You’re Not Mortal is the 4th scene in the 14th chapter of the 2nd draft of the work in progress novel During the Blue Hour. I finally completed not only this scene but the whole of chapter 14. Let me tell you I was dawdling through this scene not because it was boring but because I had to rewrite most of it. The new version of this chapter came to 8928 words. The you’re not mortal scene came to 3554 words total. The longest word counts out of all the scenes and chapters so far in the 2nd draft.
SCENE SYNOPSIS:Sirena is finally told by Cristen that she is not mortal, but in fact a caninruh and that she must stay with the pack in order to protect her, but her reaction is more than what is expected from Cristen and Sirena runs off in disbelief back to her mortal community.
In this scene it is in the 1st love interest pov ; Cristen and he has to convince Sirena that she is one of them. I originally wrote the scene in 2012 within the first draft but it wasn’t this long. It’s pretty much the same but the interactions and locations are somewhat different.
In this draft Adrian shows back up to the group and in front of Sirena in the form of the large werewolf and ordinarily Sirena would be afraid, but she can tell the difference between Adrian and any other beast because of his apparent kindness.
But like I said Cristen is the main POV so his perception is warped in this scene but not because he is an empath, and he can sense the energies between both Sirena and Adrian. So, within this scene there is a lot of tension because he is the alpha of the yearling werewolf pack and sees Adrian as trying to undermine him. In reality Adrian has fallen for Sirena and they are talking telepathically. Cristen doesn’t like that.
My greatest pitfall for this chapter is trying to keep the tension between the triangles. In the other chapters Sirena’s attitude is not one of being afraid but curious, even though she uses the excuse she is going to find her friend it is also because she is curious about the teenage wolves that saved her from the bear. However, she is still running away from them because she is in disbelief over the fact Cristen has told her she is actually a werewolf like the rest of them.
Moreover, she runs away because she has to face this truth that is her most hidden and dreadful fear in which she had tried to keep buried and locked within her dreams.
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What do you think about how characters introduce themselves to other characters that don’t know their name? Is it on the nose?
So, I am working on this scene in chapter 14 where a terrified Sirena (my main character) has just seen the werewolf pack in their nonhuman form, and she is scared shitless by their appearance being their red eyes. So, she doesn’t say anything to them, but she is freaking out. So, her love interest Cristen, alpha of the pack, in his point of view introduces himself and the rest of the pack excluding Adrian (he isn’t there) by name to get her to calm down.
So, my question is:
Is naming names within a scene like this so on the nose?
Let’s explore. Well, if you think about it, do we use each other name in daily conversation when we are talking? No. Because that would lead to boring and stilted conversation, right?
But what about when we first meet someone?
Someone usually says, ” What’s your name?” or ” Who are You?”
And we usually say, ” my name is so and so,” right? And that’s okay because we have never met that person.
But what about when it’s in fiction? Can we name names?
Answer is It depends.
Dialogue is the trickiest component in writing a fiction novel. Things can easily get bogged down and messed up making the dialogue seem stilted and unreal. But when writing dialogue, we want to make it as real as we can.
So naming names in fiction is only really used for emphasis or trying to get a character’s attention. But must be careful not to overuse it.
In my case I only use this one time in my novel for two reasons really:
Because my main character Sirena has never met the pack
And second because she is freaking out and Cristen trying to get her to calm down .
So, I’m going to see where this naming names scene takes me, and I’ll let you know how it goes .
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Have you written or read a dialogue scene where the one character is naming names?
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Sparks fly in this love triangle I got going on my work in progress novel but how?
The love triangle in my work in progress novel is just a subplot in this first novel actually and begins on the 12th chapter of my 2nd draft.
The two love interest Adrian and Cristen won’t actually realize they have feeling for Sirena until after they find out she is a werewolf. Based on how they are raised they don’t really have any interest in romancing and mating with a human girl and I don’t explore that until maybe my 3rd book in which case Eli will be the human that a new werewolf character named Amarantha falls in love with him.
But anyways there will be sparks between them all that they will ignore up until chapter 12. Not only because they think she is human but because they also have their own goals . This chapter 14 is where they finally establish she is defiantly a werewolf and boy do the emotions and sparks fly. All kinds of jealousy and animosity all over the place.
Sirena has just found out she is a werewolf from love interest Cristen and the rest of his pack. She is in this confusion scared state where she doesn’t believe any of what has just been told to her even though she already has been through a lot within the previous chapters. She literally has been almost killed twice. The first time by a religious wolf hunter and almost kidnapped by the wolf council.
But when she sees Adrian she softens a bit because Adrian saved her from getting mauled by a dog in previous chapters. But just a bit because he is in his werewolf form with red eyes and everything is just weird to Sirena. She doesn’t and can’t believe what is before her. But that sense of familiarity from him makes her draw closer to him as though she is a magnetic .
Cristen wants help from the earth diver to get off the mountain but in order to do that he has to help Sirena.
Adrian wants to become the alpha and so he thinks he can use his new found knowledge about Sirena to do that.
This love triangle between the three will consist of a lot of jealously , betrayals and secrets .
The main Character Sirena will be interested in both of them and she will have a reason to be interested in both of them. They will be her first ever love interest.
She is interested in Adrian because he seems to understand her in a way. They seem to get along and she likes Adrian because he never seems to be afraid to tell her the truth of things no matter how harshly he delivers it. And she respects him for that. And also he ends up saving her most of the time.
With her falling for Cristen he is reasonable, compassionate, and kind to her and seems to understand her differently because he can easily read her emotions and see through her insecurities because of his powers and abilities and he connects her with his emotions and calm her emerging werewolf rage. And she is able to do the same , calming him of his werewolf rage since his powers are not fully developed as well.
I don’t have Sirena really going back and forth over them like a drag out decision . Time is of the essence and she really has no time to play teenage love games with the two werewolf boys . Because she is about to become a werewolf herself dammit.
I only put in a little section within the novel where both Adrian and Cristen will give her an ultimatum to choose between them but she is like wait hold the phone . She is new to the whole boyfriend experience and feelings thing especially with them both being werewolves where they date differently. They don’t date . They mate and become pair bonds. (pair bonds is a real thing in the real world in wolf society. Check this article out about ( pair bonds)But in my novel they can’t officially mate until they get to the werewolf community anyway. Another reason why they are rushing her to make a choice is because they have never seen another werewolf girl besides Imani. And Imani is Adrian’s sister who is the future pair bond to Bastian. Cristan always also saw Imani as a sister so yeah . Sirena is basically the only werewolf girl right now they can choose from.
She basically tells them they are both crazy and she is not going to mate with them .
This particular scene in my first draft that will soon be in my 2nd draft doesn’t mean Sirena doesn’t choose one of them because she does . I don’t want to really tell you who but there is a kissing scene between Sirena and one of the two boys. And the other boy is greatly devasted by Sirena’s choice.
This choice that Sirena makes will bring a lot of conflict between both Adrian and Cristen even though they already hate each other over the whole alpha situation( I talk about that type of rivalry in a different post) Her decision doesn’t make anything better in the story even other characters hate her for what she decides. Let me just give you a little (spoiler) her decision comes to a tragic accumulation . She is never selfish about her decision and she doesn’t string them along but it’s just that the reveal of secrets and lies get in the way and makes her choice worse for everybody at the end .
This love triangle subplot is basically scattered mostly toward the middle and end of my novel. I can’t say that the three character actually fall in love perse . All three of these characters just have these new found feelings . They are all teenagers in this first novel . And they don’t know what their feelings are yet.
The only two characters I can say that know exactly what their feeling are with each other are Bastian and Imani but their true love will be tested in my later books and I don’t know where those particular love triangle storylines will go yet .
Did I need a love triangle in this first novel? No . I mean I could have done without one. I didn’t have one in my pre-draft screenplay version . But I just thought it would be fun to add more conflict to the story. I kind of like reading love triangles in other novels and thought I’d give it a try writing about one myself.
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WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE LOVE TRIANGLE FROM A BOOK YOU HAVE READ ?
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So, like you, I ‘ve heard that prologues are not thought upon lightly. Because they usually are skipped, sometimes boring or are simply not necessary.
Last year I recorded a prologue podcast episode about the origins of prologues. I liked researching for that episode. I will be recording another podcast about prologues sometime in the future.
But right now, I want to talk about the prologue in my novel that almost wasn’t. What do you mean almost wasn’t?
Well, my current prologue.
I had this same prologue in my first draft. I chose to take it out for my 2nd draft because when I was back in college some years ago, an English professor read the draft and well he ripped the prologue out because he said he simply did not read prologues.
I was kind of devastated because I worked really hard on it, and it has everything to do with the rest of the story.
My prologue is called The Magical World of Wonder and is centered on my main character’s best friend Gabby and her family. It’s very magical indeed. Not only does the prologue involve a snow globe, a music box and a werewolf but it plays with and triggers pretty heavy and intense secrets that are buried within the town and also along with Gabby’s family secrets. But It’s one of those prologues where there is a character that doesn’t appear anymore throughout the novel again. (Spoiler alert).
It’s hard to explain but it’s like a rewind fast forward scene. That can’t really be placed anywhere in the novel itself because the main character doesn’t see it or experience it. But it will bring the story kind of full circle by the end of the novel. And the character Gabby in the prologue is constantly mentioned throughout the novel by the main character and other characters. And what happens to Gabby in the prologue will come back to have heavy consequences on some of the characters within the main story. Especially Gabby’s family who are going to end up paying a heavy price for their deep and dark secrets.
So, I decided to put the prologue back in my novel. Even if readers skip over it, the readers will probably find themselves going back to it in the middle of the novel.
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Do you think having a prologue is a good idea in the novel? Should the reader go back to read the prologue or is it a waste of time?
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If you liked this excerpt and you want to see more content involving my work in progress During the Blue Hour, Follow, share and leave your comments and suggestions in the comment section below.
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Xavier with Mary attend the town meeting about the missing girl, and it revealed that they are after the wolf pack and they are wolves themselves. Xavier tries to get Mary to forget about her assignment despite the Kraldire Accaila Wrath.
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Completed yet another scene for my 14th chapter in my 2nd draft . 2750 words, not all in one day though.
This scene features the main love interest Cristen’s POV where he has to struggle and come to terms with his mother lying to him about who Sirena really was and is in fact also a werewolf like them.
This scene is yet another confrontation with him and Adrian about who Sirena really is and what she means to the yearling pack at this point .
This scene does contain a flashback scene with Cristen interacting with both his parents before they were killed .
In the flashback scene it reveals that Cristen’s mother gave him Sirena’s father’s journal that tells who she is. But his mother tells him no matter what happens don’t ever read the book just give it to Sirena when the time comes. And she also has him believe that Sirena is just a human girl.
So this is why he as my character is seen struggling.
He is supposed to be an alpha but doesn’t know the truth to anything . And he is mad because his rival Adrian knows more about Sirena than he does himself.
And the thing is in my story is that he cannot be challenged as an alpha unless he is in the community of werewolves during their ritual bluffing ceremonies . So Adrian tries to make little small jabs at Cristen whenever he can get the opportunity to because Cristen knows that Adrian wants to be the alpha of the yearling pack.
So this is the point of where I’m at and at the end of the scene Cristen screams towards Adrian ,
” Until we get to Aquilum, don’t you dare challenge me again,” he said. Before Adrian or anyone could object Cristen picked up the book and raced out the door.
Adrian just spilled the info that Cristen is the one who killed Gabby in the mountains.
The next chapter will be back in Sirena’s POV . I’ll keep you updated on this next scene within chapter 14. I’m thinking about combining two scenes into one for that scene .
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Have you ever had a character who belief system as they know it was broken down because they were challenged by the other characters?
I want to know so let me know in the comments below.
Yesterday I had a poll open for which title to name my 14th chapter . The titles being three; A New Reality , Awoken Dreams, The yearling den.Only two people voted but those two votes went 50/50 with the two appealing titles ; A New Reality and The Yearling Den .
So this is what I did. The main chapter 14 is entitled A New Reality and the first scene in the chapter 14 will be entitled Inside the Yearling Den.
CHAPTER 14 SUMMARY
Sirena awakens insides the yearling cave to find Cristen and the rest of the pack arguing and discussing her. Cristen struggles to make a decision to tell Sirena who she really is. While Xavier and Mary devise another plan to capture Sirena .
Yesterday I was able to finish the first scene which came to 778 words .
And I went ahead and named it inside the yearling den because Sirena the main character literally wakes up in the yearling den in like a kind of hole within the cave that wolves in real life usually sleep in. The hole is large within the cave . In fact the cave itself has many large holes within. the walls of the cave that surround a large body cenote and waterfalls.
But within these shallow holes it is dark and so Sirena is basically laying on like a makeshift bed of sticks , twigs and rocks and she is in pain being wounded from the previous chapter but however she is also scared when she wakes up within this darken hole in the wall. Of course because she doesn’t know where she is .
She only sees these beings with red eyes who look like her. And she hears that they have healed her but it didn’t work. Scared she remembers what happened to her and Eli in the previous chapter 13 and she sees a crawl space and literally crawls out of it to go after him .
I wrote this scene like this because her new reality hasn’t kicked in yet and it won’t for the rest of the novel until maybe the end . But this chapter will basically be the start of where she finds out about her true werewolf existence.
The next chapter will be in Cristen’s POV . I’ll keep you updated on the next scene within chapter 14.
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WHAT IS YOUR CHAPTER 14 LIKE?
I want to know so let me know in the comments below.
Need a little assistance . I’m starting chapter 14 today .
SUMMARY FOR CHAPTER 14
Sirena awakens insides the yearling cave to find Cristen and the rest of the pack arguing and discussing her. Cristen struggles to make a decision to tell Sirena who she really is. While Xavier and Mary devise another plan to capture Sirena .
If you liked this blog post and you want to see more content involving my work in progress During the Blue Hour Follow and share . THEN LET’S START A DIALOGUE
I want to know so let me know in the comments below.
You can also interact with the podcast on Gab @duringthebluehour
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